Wednesday, July 30, 2014

It’s All About Vocabulary – Or Not! (Part Two!)

By Wendy Burke

    At one time, I was usually one of the youngest persons anywhere I worked. It gave me a sense of pride as I advanced through my profession at such a young age.
    Now, however….
    I have twice the years on most of the ‘kids’ I work with. And, damn, it’s true, kids DO say the darndest things!
    I mentioned last month about how words have meaning and vocabulary is slowly becoming archaic – well, so is common knowledge.
   For instance, I booked a camel farmer (yes, a CAMEL farmer) on one of the shows I produce, and he was mentioning how camel milk is incredibly nutritious. From one cubbie producer, “I didn’t know camels had nipples OR gave milk!” (She mentioned the same after a story about manatees.)
   One young lady passed my desk en route to the copier. “Uh, Wendy, could you help me? I don’t know how to use the copy machine.”  Sorry, had to reply, “Tough love, get on in there and figure it out!”
   Ever have a really good sandwich on Chewbacca Bread? One of the anchors at our station loves the stuff, regaling its deliciousness on air, although I’m not sure how she dodges all that hair! (Nope, still not sure if she knows it’s ‘ciabatta’).
  A few of us in the office actually remember a time before cable/satellite/streaming TV and we were discussing how few channels we could watch. We got twice as many in our household – three out of Milwaukee and three out of Green Bay. Of course, you had to turn the antenna from south to north. Same camel/manatee/nipple/milk producer asks, “Didn’t that suck having to go up on the roof and move the antenna all the time?” Uh, it’s called a ‘rotor, honey, and it sat on top of your TV…INSIDE.
   The same producer is full of wondering. News release: man found dead in apartment, died during an act of ‘auto-erotism. Her question, “What was he doing with a car?”
   And finally, my Chewbacca-bread eating coworker once asked about aspirin and how to pronounce analgesic. When I mentioned it’s ‘ANN-al-gee-zick’ she wiped her brow and let out a sigh of relief. “Thanks,” she says, “I’m glad I didn’t have to say it on the air, I thought it was ANAL-gesic.”
   That, my Decadent Publishing and 1Night Stand authors, you may use in your next m/m romance!
   You may think I’m making this up – another funny story out of my head. Sorry…not possible, truth is funnier than fiction!
   Like I mentioned last month, don’t worry, there is SO a book here! 

When not playing with the people in her head, Wendy has a full time job behind the scenes in television, a part time job in radio and an even 'parter' time job trying to keep her house clean. She lives with her cute chef husband and three fuzzy felines in the Great Lakes region of the Mid-West. You can holler at her:

#wendyburke, #decadentpub, #MadameEve, #1NS, #1nightstand, #onenightstand 

1 comment:

  1. That's hilarious! Anal-gesic.... ha! You're co-workers seem to provide you with a constant source of amusement and writing material. They do say to write what you know. :)