Good
morning. My name is Bunny and I’m your hostess today on the 1NightStand blog,
and that filter you have between your brain and mouth—well, I don’t have one of
them. Just saying. So, don’t expect it.
This
month I’m interviewing Lily from Lightning. She’s the one that knocked the
power out for Sleepy Hollow a few years back. Pthhhh, and you seriously thought
it was a storm?
Upon
reading her profile, I see that we have a lot of things in common. For one
thing, she’s a demon, a succubus, and I too am a demon, a soul collector of
sorts. I prefer the term recruiter of the damned. We obviously both have great
taste in clothes and men, and I too have sisters, older sisters, a legion of
them.
When I
was a young demon and still lived at home, around my house, the wonder years
and PMS were not pretty. It gave a bad day in hell a whole new meaning. You
want to talk hell? One bathroom and a legion of sisters. Do you have any idea
what I had to do to get some mirror time? Seriously, sisters can....
*Blinks*
Oh, I’m
getting off topic. I just love to reminisce about the past. And I understand my
guest today has been reminiscing a lot lately about her past. So let’s get this
party going. We’ll start with an easy question.
Tell us
about the night you began to fight your natural instincts. I mean you are a sex
demon and you do have to, how do I put this delicately, screw your brains out, boff
like a bunny... um okay, not like a bunny, but you know what I mean. You have
to scratch that itch. Go ahead and tell the readers what triggered the insanity,
why you put off men and chose to slowly waste away.
Wow, Bunny, you do go on, don’tcha, babe?
Oooh kitty has claws. We really should talk about some
of the job openings I have available. You would be perfect for many positions,
and not all are on your back. But do tell, why have you sworn off sex again?
Buy Lightning HERE |
Okay, well, first of all, I am not a sex DEMON.
I do not collect souls. I am a sex GODDESS.
I rock their world. I give them the hottest time of their life. I leave
them whimpering, vibrating, electronically-charged pools of molten testosteronic
jelly. (I may have made that up. I may also be channeling my sisters just a
teensy tinsy bit.)
Of course, your mileage may vary, Bunny! (My eyes don’t go red.)
But yeah, my first time (and
first time with a mortal) did not go, how shall I say it…well. Oh, the sex was mind-blowing and all. In fact, it kinda
literally blew the mind of my prom date, the great love of my life, Campbell
Jones. Left him comatose. I didn’t quite know what I was doing then and I had years of pent-up frustration building.
So when I finally let it loose…snap, crackle & pop, you might say. Poor,
poor Campbell. When the paramedics
scraped him up, zapped into unconsciousness, I thought he was dead. Mourned him
a good long time, too. Little did I know
Campbell was busy acquiring, um, super (staying) powers.
So…yeah. I’ve been a little skittish about
mortals, you might say.
And talk about sisters! Really? You want to go there? Holy crow. You
don’t know from whacky, oversexed, domineering older sisters until you’ve met mine. Dagney and Zena. I mean, shoot, there I was, opening
my brand spanking new professional office as an accident reconstruction expert
(Okay, so yeah, I may have a teensy, tinsy bit of history there), when in flit
my sisters ready to re-arrange my life.
I mean, it’s barely page 3 of my story and Zena’s already got her sexy
lips wrapped around the southern part of the anatomy of the maintenance guy
hanging my diploma on the wall. Sorta
makes sharing a bathroom pale in comparison. Ya know?
Until
you have a legion in your closet stealing your haute couture, I don’t want to
hear it. Okay, so sharing a bathroom isn’t that bad, but when they touch the
shoes, someone is going to get hurt. *runs nail file over ends of pitchfork*
What
kept you from going out, finding a tall drink of water and sucking him down
like a high-calorie smoothie? There’s much to be said about breaking your diet
and going for the fast food. You know how they say that if you deny yourself a
treat every now and then, you’re going to fall off the wagon and binge.
Yeah, well. I’m a succubus, as you’ve pointed out. Got to keep the
hormones and electrolytes and all that other stuff in cosmic balance. Or the
lightning tends to strike. Like, you know, with poor Campbell. And the lower
Hudson Valley power grid. And all the
cell phone service in Sleepy Hollow. So whenever I’d need to scratch an itch,
I’d make a booty call to an incubus. Talk about fast food. I had them on speed dial. But…you know. The slam-bam-thank-you ma’am is
not that filling. You tend to want a meatier meal an hour later.
I hear
you there. I once dated this Hell Lord.... An incubus. The sex was off the
scale, but in the end, he ate all my takeout, drank all my beer, and didn’t put
the toilet seat down, so I pushed him in a lava pool. It’s so hard to find what
you want out there.
I
understand your sisters were concerned about you. Is that why you used the
password they gave you to unlock instructions on where to meet your date?
Yeah. Something was definitely missing. I was beginning to fade
away. Zena thought I was looking whiter than Edward Cullen. A fair complexion is one thing. Translucent
is another. So it was definitely time to sink my lips into something more tasty
and nutritious.
Since
you’re a succubus, I’ll just get to the question everyone has on their mind.
What was your favorite part of the date?
Campbell.
The blindfold?
Campbell.
Did anything other than who your date was, surprise you?
Campbell’s ability to ….uh, yeah. No. Nice try, though.
Do you like bondage? Whips, chains, maybe a nice riding crop?
Campbell. Campbell, Campbell, Campbell.
Rather single-minded aren’t you. Anyway, I have these
cuffs....
Whatever works for you, honey-bunny.
Honey-Bunny? Listen Fry-Girl, Bunny doesn’t swing that
way, well only on special occasions, but I’m not into succubus, just so you
know. Your kind are clingy and just too draining. *Glances around quiet
audience* Okay, so I might have experimented a time or two, but doesn’t
everyone do that in college?
And hey, you in the audience, you haven’t read that
Fifty Shades of something or another? Please, everyone knows that cuffs and
blindfolds are the new red. Get with the trends. Seriously, come out of the dungeon
people. You didn’t fall off the escalator to heaven yesterday. You know what
I’m talking about. Japanese knot tying, nipple clamps....
*sighs*
Never
mind. Keep pretending to be innocent. Bunny knows the truth, every single bit
of that dirty debauchery you try to hide. *Eyes flash red* Now, where was I? Oh
yes. Since your sisters filled out the questionnaire for you, did they get it right;
did you get your perfect match? What kind of traits would you have listed that
they didn’t?
Did I happen to mention…CAMPBELL???
Cambell,
smambell. Got it, pumpkin. You’d forget all about your soup guy, dear, if you
saw the way this.... Never mind, *snaps fingers in front of her* she’s a goner.
Whatever works for you Fry-Girl.
Okay,
it’s time for quickies. Everyone loves quickies. *Stops and eyes the audience*
Well, almost everyone. Alright, here we go.
How tall does he need to be to get on the ride?
If he’s on his back or hanging from the
chandelier, do you really think that matters?
Good point. We’ll move on. Boxers or Briefs?
Commando.
Roses or orchids?
Gardenias. (Campbell knows this.)
I have a feeling there’s a story there. Suits or Jeans?
Oh, my Goddess! Have you SEEN Campell in his tux? Or out of it for
that matter? (You better NOT have seen
him out of it, Bunny, on second and third thought.)
Is that a challenge? I mean I do have some pretty decent
optics available. If you insist I can certainly check him out. *Points
pitchfork.* Put the claws away. We’re civilized here and people who play with
Bunny get hurt. You might break a nail or something. I get it, he’s yours. That
leaves how many million for me?
Does size matter?
Campbell’s got no problems there. And I’ve got no complaints.
Lights
on or off? Oh that’s right; you like to take out the power grid. My bad. So, I
can safely say lights off—or is that out?
We kinda like stars and lightning lighting up
the night sky.
Hopeless! Winter or summer? Somehow you don’t strike me
as the snow angel type.
Hot, hot, HOT.
And outdoors, baby!
Does he have any brothers, and do you have their phone
number?
Funny you should ask. He’s got a really HUNKY brother, Sean. (Don’t tell either of them I said so.) Sean’s the hero of THUNDER, another 1Night
Stand story now available from Decadent Publishing. Campbell and I fixed Sean up.
Kinda. Sorta. With the help of Madame Evangeline, of course! (But those Jones
brothers have a lot of tasty guys on their crews, if you’re interested. Oh,
Goddess. What am I saying? You? Not. Interested? BWAHAHAHAHA!)
*Blinks*
What? Now what a minute there, sister. You are going to share? Do you really
blame me? Please tell the readers what he looks like, Lily.
Swoon-worthy.
Thanks
for the in depth description, Lily. And thanks for coming today and sitting in
the hot seat. Leans closer. Don’t forget to give me that number before you go.
Sometimes you just have to bypass the homework and get straight to the
stalking. You know what I mean. I’m all about time savers.
To find
out how Lily’s date went, make sure to stop by Decadent and pick up the tell
all exclusive, Lightning.
And if
you want to read Sean’s story, Thunder, you can pick that up HERE
Thanks for stopping by.
Ciao, Lovelies!
Very funny!!! Campbell!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by, Barbara!
ReplyDeleteAnd Bunny, well, what can I say?
(I might have said it as Campbell or Lily, but I don't see an option I can use to comment here. So you'll all just have to use your imagination!)
Wow, Bunny and Lily are quite the match for each other. LOL Great interview! :)
ReplyDeleteWonderful interview. Someone's got an obsession with Campbell.
ReplyDeleteCan't blame you. Sounds delicious.